A.R.E. Weapons - A.R.E. Weapons

On their eponymous debut, A.R.E. Weapons attempt to do for post-punk/"electroclash" music what Andrew WK did for metal - ie, sing about life's simplest joys and challenges (fun, parents, drugs, etc) set to a backdrop of supercharged, keyboard-driven hard rock, taking "dumb" things REAL seriously and presumably free of irony. However, all the positive energy and anthemic catharsis of AWK's record has been replaced by paranoia, thug posturing, and an uncomfortable feeling that the whole thing is extremely calculated. Sonically, the disc is fairly catchy, in a store-soundtrack kind of way, but any non-superficial listen simply enhances that nagging flaw. Tracks like "Fuck You Pay Me" and "Street Gang," while not completely without charm, feel like an elaborate put on by affluent NYC hipsters more than anything else. No amount of clever, Suicide-styled guitar and lo-fi electronics can deflect attention away from the lyrical unbelievability for an extended period. It'd be easy to write A.R.E. Weapons off if the music wasn't so listenable, Marc Waterman's studio polish adds much to the proceedings. Yet by the time the children's chorus (!!!) comes in on the album closing "Hey World," any remaining shreds of credibility fly laughably out the window. Not the worst thing you could listen to, but by no means essential listening. [www.roughtradeamerica.com]